This week, let’s focus on the present.  We’re doing a bit of introspection and working on ourselves this week.

I always get to this time of year and appreciate the time with family and friends.  I appreciate the slower work pace (albeit more frenetic holiday pace).  And, I begin the new year with a desire to have better balance in my life.  Do you feel this way too?

But, I’m a firm believer that work-life balance is a complete myth.  We make choices with how we spend our time.  (As I’m writing this post I have literally stopped 3 times so far to hug my daughter Lili who has wandered into the office.  I literally have chosen to stop what I am doing, look over, smile, and hug her.  This is a choice.)  I have had to work on being conscious of these choices and being much more intentional with how I spend my time.

And so today, I want you to think about your perception of balance.  Here’s some questions that will help you…

What is balance to you?

How will you live a life that is balanced under this definition?

What limitations do you need to set on yourself to do this?

When do you need to say ‘no’ more often?

When do you need to say ‘yes’ more often?

How have you been challenged in making these choices in the past?

A holiday deal for you…

Throughout these 3 weeks, we’ll be offering $100 off The Simple Plan Exclusive which is our one-to-one partnership with small business owners to help build a business plan.  Simply visit The Simple Plan website to learn more about The Exclusive and enter the discount code “2012” when you enroll.  This offer is only good through December 30^th and space is limited to first-come-first-served.

This week, let’s focus on the present.  This series is going to be a bit more introspective.  I want you to reflect on your personal life today… where are you in your life?  And, what do you want from your personal life?  I ask these questions because many of us start our businesses because we have personal goals (completely separate from career aspirations) that we are trying to achieve.  We start a business because we want a lifestyle that will afford us those personal goals.

I’ll share with you my story.  In 2004 I was married.  My husband and I actually sat down and talked about what we wanted our lives to look like.  In a nutshell, we wanted to be equal active partners in raising our future child(ren).  I didn’t see myself as the primary caretaker and he didn’t want to see his kids on only nights and weekends.  We wanted to share in those things.  We designed our lifestyle and cut our career to match.  I started a stationery business and he has always either worked for himself as an independent consultant, or negotiated an employment contract whereby he can work from home.  Our careers were built to match the family life we aspired to have.  It hasn’t always been easy, but I’m glad to say we’ve been able to do it OUR WAY.

So, I’d like you to reflect on your personal life.  A few questions to consider…

Where are you NOW?

What do you want from your life?

What are your life goals and aspirations?  (not business goals)

What sort of lifestyle do you envision for yourself?

What do you want your life to look like in 5 years? 10 years? 15 years? 20 years?

A holiday deal for you…

Throughout these 3 weeks, we’ll be offering $100 off The Simple Plan Exclusive which is our one-to-one partnership with small business owners to help build a business plan.  Simply visit The Simple Plan website to learn more about The Exclusive and enter the discount code “2012” when you enroll.  This offer is only good through December 30^th and space is limited to first-come-first-served.

Ron Dawson
Owner, Dare Dreamer Media – DareDreamer.net
Editor/Writer, Dare Dreamer Magazine – DareDreamerMag.com
Atlanta, GA
Established 2002

Why did you start your business?

It was January 2002. I was visiting a good friend of mine who’s an indie filmmaker in LA. By this time it had been 8 years since I left the film and TV program at De Anza College in Cupertino, CA. (My buddy, who attended the prestigious USC film school, would often tease me about my community college film education.  But the truth is, De Anza has one of the most recognized and respected film programs in the nation. But I digress.) My buddy asked me a question that literally change the direction of my life. “So Ron, what do you want to do with your life?” My answer was, “Well, eventually I’d like to do my own feature film.” He just nodded his head, pursed his lips a bit, and said, “Okay, cool, cool. Umm, how are you going to do that at Inuit?”

At the time I was a business marketing manager for Quicken at Intuit making six figures. I was a bachelor, had no debt, and loved that financial stability. My plan was to continue working there, do films for fun on the side, eventually make a feature (on the side), get discovered, sign a contract with a major studio, then quit my job at Intuit. But, life doesn’t work like that. Especially if you want to make it in the film business.

I decided I would quit my job and pursue my passion. That summer I did just that. Oh, and I also got married, became a step dad, and started a business, all that same summer. Not necessarily the recommended way to start out, but it worked for me.

What book do you recommend to new business owners?

For the longest time my answer to that question would have been easy, Michael Gerber’s “The E-myth”. It talks about the importance of building a business as a business, something you could turn around and sell. He talks about creating systems in your business for making it run like a franchise (whether or not you actually plan to franchise it).  I think there’s still a lot of validity to much of that, and a lot of what he talks about is important for professional creatives to understand. But, as my smart and beautiful wife has pointed out to me recently, current thought-leaders like Seth Godin laugh at some of those precepts. As Seth points out in his book “Linchpin,” it’s important to be one, that person who connects people, makes things happens, and brings order to chaos. The E-myth doesn’t really cover things like that.

So, I think if I were to answer the book question now, it would be either Seth’s “Purple Cow” or “Linchipin” because they speak to really important intangibles like branding and self-discovery. “Linchpin” is a book you can apply to your life even if you’re an employee.

However, the book I’m currently reading is also a winner. The Steve Jobs biography by Walter Isaacson. It’s the most fascinating true story I’ve read in years. Jobs was one of the most influential businessmen in both the 20th and 21st centuries. I haven’t finished it, but it’s already having an effect on how I look at my life and my business. When you look at what he did with Apple, the ups and downs he went through in life, it’s both inspring and encouraging. It’s filled with warnings of what one should NOT do in business, as well as examples of what’s possible when you dream big and focus.

Do you have any cool goal-setting tips to share with us?

Funny you should ask. As a matter of fact, I do. Seth Godin’s “Pick Four.” It’s based on Zig Ziglar’s program for attaining goals. Best selling author Seth Godin (“Purple Cow”) swears by it. He says that when he was broke he adopted this plan and it changed his life. Ziglar’s original system was based on picking six goals, then every single day tracking your progress in each goal. Seth adopted the system and simplified it down to four. It really does make a huge difference when you track your progress every day. Even if you do nothing related to your goal, you write that you did nothing. After 3-5 days of writing “nothing” in your journal, you get motivated to start doing SOMETHING. And that’s the key. Doing SOMETHING, anything, every day. One day at at time. Inching your way toward your goals. My wife and I are currently doing it.

As we wrote in our own book, it’s important to pick goals that are S.M.A.R.T. – Specific. Measurable. Attainable. Realistic. and Timely. We didn’t make that up, we just wrote about it. One of my four goals is what I call “12 in 12″. 12 personal films in 12 months. It’s specific (12 short films). It’s measurable (um, twelve films). It’s attainable (it’s something I have the aptitude to achieve). It’s realistic (based on my schedule, that’s about what I figure I can realistically accomplish). And it’s timely (12 months).

What do you find to be the biggest challenge as a business owner?

Wow. There are so many big challenges. Nowadays, just hitting your revenue numbers is a big challenge. But regardless of your revenue, one challenge that is always there it seems like is balancing work with family life. If you’re really successful and raking in the dough, this is a challenge. If you’re scrambling to make ends meet, it’s still a challenge. I have learned that you have to be intentional about spending time with family. There will never, ever be enough time to finish all the work you have to do when it comes to running a business. If you start with that premise, and just accept that fact, life will be much easier. Knowing that I will never get everything done means that I don’t have to feel guilty when I don’t get everything done. I need to put on my calendar scheduled time with my wife and kids (and I do).

If you were starting your business all over again, what would you have done differently?

That’s easy. I would not have taken on as much business debt as I did. The amount of business debt we had was not necessarily exorbitant as businesses go. And definitely not by the world’s standards. But, we’re still paying it off and it sucks. We’d have so much more monthly cash flow if we weren’t making credit card payments every month. Some of it on equipment we no longer use or seminars and programs we NEVER used. Ugh. It kills me thinking of some of the stuff we spent money on years ago. We’ve since become huge fans of Dave Ramsey‘s system for looking at money. We cut up our credit cards about four years ago. We don’t buy anything now unless we have the cash in the back to cover it.  That’s why I’m such a huge proponent of renting equipment vs. buying. It pains me when I see all this new filmmakers (or old ones) going out and spending thousands of dollars they don’t have to buy equipment that will be up-staged by yet another new camera or rig 6 months from now. I’m not saying you should never buy equipment, but do it when you 1) have the cash to buy it out-right, and 2) you know you have the business coming to pay it off.

Besides, as I always like to say, it’s the talent, not the tools.

Thank you Ron!

How will you take care of yourself over the next few months?

I’m asking this question because I want you to be proactive in your health.  Instead of letting things happen to you, how will you take preventative measures to stay healthy?

The machine needs to be taken care of.  Otherwise, the whole operation will fall apart.

I remember reading something before giving birth to my daughter Lili that changed my outlook on how well (or not) I take care of myself.  When you have a child, you need to take care of yourself or you cannot provide for that child.  You know the airline emergency preparedness instructions?  They tell you to put on your oxygen mask before taking care of those around you.  When the plane is going down, mommy better be able to breathe in order to take care of her loved ones.

It’s like this in business too.  Your business cannot run without you.  (WELL – some of you have gotten to the points in your business where you staff CAN take over if you are ill or face an emergency.  KUDOS to you for getting here!)  Your business needs you to have health.  The machine needs to be running smoothly or the operation will fail.

I repeat… How will you take care of yourself over the next few months?

Here are some things that I do:

• Get sleep
  Ideally 8 hours, but 6 hours at a minimum (and only on rare occasions).
• Nip a cold in the bud
  The minute you start to feel the cold symptoms, try my “MAGICAL TEA” (below) and take a nap.  I swear on my next born child that you will be able to prevent getting sick by doing these 2 easy things.  Rest is key.
• Take time off
  The holidays can be a slow time for wedding businesses, but we tend to fill them with a lot of other obligations.  Just because you aren’t working 80 hours a week doesn’t mean you’re taking care of yourself.  Slow down and take time to relax.

And now… for something totally non-business related… but totally health related… my recipe for…

MAGICAL TEA

The three secret ingredients to the “Special-Tea” are:

1)    Ginger (Fresh Ginger Root)
2)    Lemon
3)    Honey

That’s it!

It’s like rubbing Vic’s Vaporub on the inside of your lungs or throat – when you have a cough or sore throat.  When I have a cough I will drink this every two hours – and it is incredible.  Also, the combination with the lemon and the honey taste so good.  (I like LOTS of honey.)

Here’s what you do: (you may need to experiment with amounts to get the taste that suits you)

1 – Boil water in your teakettle.

2 – While you are boiling the water, fill a thermos with the following:

• Grated ginger (about 1” of the root) – (See * below)
• Juice from 1 lemon
• 3-4 tablespoons of honey

3 – When the water has come to a boil, pour it into the thermos.

4 – Let the ingredients steep for 15-20 minutes.

5 – Strain the tea into a mug and enjoy!

If you don’t have a thermos, you can boil the water in an open pan, add the ginger and simmer for 10-15 minutes.  Turn off the heat, and add the lemon and honey and let it sit for a minute before straining into a mug.  When you want more, just heat it up.  (I like the thermos because I can keep coming to a nice warm batch over a long period of time and not having to keep boiling it.)

* I get tired of grating ginger when I’m sick.  Whole Foods (or the Asian aisle in your local market) will have jars of “minced” or “grated” ginger.  I will sometimes use this.  The minced version is a bit more like a puree – so it will go thru a strainer – but it doesn’t bother me if the tea is a little thick.  If you do mind it, then go for the jarred “grated” ginger.

Also, the ginger’s spice is what is so therapeutic.  Make sure you have enough so that you can feel it tingling.

Download the MAGICAL TEA recipe.

Here’s to a healthy and happy holiday season!

Photograph: Nils Jorgensen / Rex Features -- Source: The Guardian UK

I just finished reading Open, Andre Agassi’s autobiography.  This isn’t a book you’ll typically find me reading.  I know very little about tennis and I don’t follow sports, in general.  But, I was fascinated by his life as a misunderstood superstar (often pegged as ‘rebel’).  He was forced into playing tennis by his demanding father and spent his whole life into his 30s trying to deal with this ‘job’ he hates and learning who he is deep down.  It was a fascinating read.

In his late 20′s and early 30′s is when Agassi really hits his stride is his career.  He learns to embrace the job he hates because he sees that the fame and money can be used to leverage something he is very passionate about: education.  (This is an ironic choice since he dropped out of school in 9th grade.)  He is the founder of the Andre Agassi Prepatory Academy in Las Vegas.  This charter school and the promise to underprivileged children is what fuels him and inspires him.  And, his performance shows.  No longer is he the “image is everything” kid of the 80s.  There is substance to this tennis star.  And he has more wins late in life than he did as a young superstar.

He retires from tennis at age 35 (one of the oldest to retire in the tennis profession) and often reflects on his tennis career.  One of his great realizations is that he has spent time in his career being EXTREMELY inspired and motivated.  And, there have been times that he has lacked these attributes entirely.  He has performed accordingly.

It has made me reflect on my own career (and past careers).  There are times where I have been incredibly inspired in my job(s).  And, there are times where I can’t find any inspiration to save my life (or my day).  Like Agassi, I question myself, “Why the lack of inspiration?  Do I need to retire?”  (REALLY – I cannot retire.  But, Agassi often asked himself this question.  It does make me wonder what the next step is, tho.  And, it makes me question if I’m in the right place.)

But, this is life.  Inspiration ebbs and flows.  When I am void of inspiration, it’s time for me to come back to my foundation.  Like Agassi, I need to find the passion in what I do.  When the inspiration is free-flowing is the time for me to perform.  To win a grand slam.

What about you?  Have you felt this before?  Do you have peaks and valleys in your inspiration?  Share with us in a comment below.

“Oh Renee is having major FOMS over missing that party next weekend as she’ll be out of town.”“

“The hardest thing about living away from home is the FOMS you get when your friends are getting together and you can’t join in the fun with them.”

“I had a bad case of the FOMS for missing that Prince concert.  I heard it was amazing!”

“You know Jeff.  He always has such a hard time committing to activities on the weekend because of FOMS. He doesn’t want to miss out on anything good – ANYWHERE.”

Fortunately, my friends and I are all pretty balanced individuals and the FOMS never get too out of control.  But, we do all suffer from FOMS from time to time.  We want to be in all fun places at all times.  It’s the opportunity cost of having to choose one thing over another.

But, the FOMS can be dangerous.

The FOMS prevent you from totally being present in what you are doing.  It prohibits you from focusing on the current moment.  It minimizes your ability to let go and enjoy yourself.  It puts the focus on “what could have been” instead of “what is”.  We glorify the former and minimize the latter.

We do this in business too.  We get the FOMS in business.

In business, we often have to make hard choices.  We choose one place to advertise over another.  We choose one networking event over another.  We choose one style of branding over another.  We hire one assistant over another.  Some of us are good at being content in our decisions. While others toil and deliberate in those decisions. The FOMS attack and there is constant second-guessing of the choices made.  It’s a stressful existence to say the least.

It’s hard to be at peace in your business and mature as a business-owner if you allow yourself to be a victim of FOMS.  Next time you feel FOMS creeping in, look at everything around you, enjoy your place in the present, and keep your eyes looking forward.  There’s no reason to fear that you’re missing something, when you’re surrounded by so much goodness.

Do you experience this fear of missing something?

As business owners we become so accustomed to doing things on our own.  In fact, we are incredibly resourceful and can figure out almost anything.  This becomes second nature to the point that we rarely ask others for help.

But, this is silly when you think about it.  We should lean on each other more often.  One of the things I love most about this industry is people’s willingness to help out a colleague.  We should ASK for HELP.  We are not alone.  We should recognize our weaknesses and ask help from others that are strong in those areas.  In some cases, it may just be a little advice that we need on an area we are exploring.  In some cases, we should be hiring professionals to work on things we are not always qualified to do.

We should look at our colleagues as our business partners and team-members.

Who could you go to for help?  Make a list of your top 5 ‘wedding industry friends’ who can help you grow your business.  List their strengths and how they can support you.

I’m not just speaking to start-up businesses.  I’m talking to anyone at any level of entrepreneurship.  No matter how long you’ve been in business, there is some ‘next level’ that you’d like to achieve.  What’s holding you back?

Can you think of someone that is not perfect at what they do but fearless?  I can.  They don’t always get it right, but they aren’t afraid to get out there and take a risk to achieve something.  They may not even the best at what they do but they put themselves out there whole-heartedly.  And, they manage to shake things up.  They continuously introducing new ideas and concepts to our industry.

As entrepreneurs, none of you are short on ideas.  Every single one of you has huge potential to do great things.  However, it’s the innovators that are able to overcome their fears and take a chance.  It doesn’t mean that they had more intelligent ideas than the next guy.  They just acted on those ideas.  It doesn’t mean that they aren’t scared.  The fear never totally goes away.  They’re only a little more accustomed to ignoring it.

How is fear holding you back from being an innovator?

Interview with Laura Hooper of Laura Hooper Calligraphy
www.lhcalligraphy.com
Calligraphy Artist

Where do you seek inspiration for your creations?

I look to nature most often for inspiration – you’ll find that many of our designs feature florals, birds and other living elements. Living in Hermosa Beach near the ocean lends greatly to all of our sea-inspired designs! I also find inspiration in the architecture around me. This helps us create various shapes, dimensions and even textures, one of my new favorite elements to work into my Lucky Orchid stationery.

How do you personally work to improve your craft?

Since clients usually come to me with a precise vision of what they what, I try to take advantage of the opportunities I have to truly “create” when I don’t have rigid guidelines. When my sister and I both got married I was able to really work my creative juices for our engagement parties, showers and weddings. And when my clients come to me with simply a color scheme I do my best to design something truly original that they will love. It is when I have freedom to design that I most able to improve myself and grow.

How do you feel you have evolved as an artist?

I am definitely more comfortable in my designs now than I was when I first started nearly 10 years ago. I went from “just” calligraphy wedding envelopes to developing a line of 2-4 piece invitation sets to creating a world’s worth of custom maps to creating 4+ piece invitation suites that include pocket folders, various textures, letterpressed envelopes – the sky is the limit!

Anything else you want to advise people who are looking to build upon their artistic talents?

Practice makes perfect! Actually “doing” versus continually “studying” is the best way to improve your talents.

Compass with tag IMG_7490 IMG_8481 0842 Headshot2

Thank you Laura for sharing your talents with us!

Interview with Nancy Liu Chin, Owner of Nancy Liu Chin Floral & Event Design
www.nancyliuchin.com
Floral and Event Designer

Where do you seek inspiration for your creation?

This is a great question because it’s changing. When I first started floral design, much of my inspiration came from other well known schools of floral design. But more recent, I’m really inspired by architectural linens, interior design, ethnic motifs, fashion, food.

For fun, I love window shopping which gets me rather excited. Most major department stores have staff devoted to doing window displays and usually they have a limited budget so many display managers have to bit very resourceful in order to come up with creative and eye catching displays. One time I recall a store hanging a whole bunch of cd’s as a backdrop and I just loved its simplicity. When the lights hit the moving cd’s there’s this wonderful effect. Another display had thousand of butterflies grouped in a beautiful “wavy” pattern. I love how windows tell a story with so few props. That’s inspiring to me.

How do you personally work to improve your craft?

During the off season when I have more time, I’m taking left over flowers and testing new designs. When I use to do more photoshoots, I used that as an opportunity to practice my craft. During the season, I usually let me staff do unique toss bouquets. We take the “leftover” flowers that weren’t used and try to make something amazing and different.

No matter if you’ve done 10 weddings or 100 weddings, you have to work on the details of your craft.

How do you feel you have evolved as an artist?

My style in the beginning was to do as many creative things as I could but now I’m a better editor. When you do things for years, I don’t add to your design, you are constantly removing so that your style is perfected.

It’s so true, a little goes a long way….and less is truly more.

Tell us about Wedding Floral Academy.  What is it about? What can participants expect to learn?

A few years back I was asked to speak at a panel discussion for industry people. A group of us talked about trends in the market. And at the end of the panel discussion, there was a typical q and a session. I recalled one professional asked me how I got inspired? Another pro asked me what type of marketing I did? And after a while, I noticed that a few members were very quiet and reserved. Don’t blame them for not wanting to share their secrets but I took a difference route. I realized it was more rewarding to share my tips with others. And honesty, I fundamentally believed that what one company does to make it a success doesn’t mean that it will work for another company. More and more, I realized that many people who become a floral and event designer have the passion for the craft but not the passion for the craft of managing a small business. And in 2009, Wedding Floral Academy became a reality. I’m so excited about it. It’s a 3 day pro class which covers on hand floral design tips and inspirations, insights into business development, assessment of business marketing with takeaways.

The workshops are small and intimate so that there is no fear of judgment. We keep it to 6 attendees with 2 volunteers.

Thanks Nancy for your valuable resources!

Join us tomorrow where we’ll learn from Laura Hooper.